”A rattling panel fan in the kitchen window pushed around a lot of warm, soupy air. The room smelled of cigarette smoke, cooking oil, and a faint un...ertone of bananas rotting somewhere. I stood there uneasily, hands jammed in the pockets of my painter’s pants—one of which held the rubbers I bought last week—my heart beating fast, while Eleanor Kaminski dumped a scoop of powder into a tall glass, added tap water, and stirred it all up into a murky, swirling brown. She went to the freezer and. And, little bitch that I am, I was thinking that if he was that concerned, why didn’t he come and visit me in the hospital? At the same time, I was still scared of the lecture he’d give me about deceiving him and relationships built on trust. The question—or accusation—never came.The longer it went, the more guilty I felt and then I got really irritated with the guy because he should have been criticizing me. I was sitting there getting more and more upset with him just because he wasn’t. Several weeks later while Mother and I lay side by side naked on my parents big bed I fingered her wet pussy while kissing one of her grapefruit sized tits. I had just finished giving her a bare bottom spanking with my hand and masturbating her to an intense orgasm. I had stopped using the belt on her because I didn't want my Dad to see the marks again. If he asked my grandfather about using the belt on his daughter I didn't want Grandpa Jack to say that he only used his hand. Then my father. She had calmed down for a moment. She laid her head on my shoulder and kissed me. I kissed her back. She grabbed my hand and pulled up her dress. I needed no more guidance, and I reached down into her panties. I found her panties to be soaked with her vaginal secretions. I rubbed her clitoris as she squirmed atop me. I then guided a finger into her tight, hairless vagina up to the knuckle. I pulled it out and continued to finger her as she sat on my lap. I pulled my finger out and removed her.
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